Zastanawiałam się którą destynacją zainaugurować opisywanie podróżniczych przygód i doszłam do wniosku, że wybranie pierwszej byłoby zbyt oczywiste. Ostatniej w zasadzie też.
Padło więc na Tajlandię – kierunek, który dostarczył nam masy przygód, wiele nauczył, a jednocześnie byliśmy na niego przygotowani bardziej niż skrupulatnie.
Ale po kolei.
Jeszcze w liceum, w czasie lekcji angielskiego oglądaliśmy w oryginale film „W matni”. Nie wdając się w szczegóły skrócę fabułę do kluczowego minimum – świeżo upieczone maturzystki z juesej poznają w Bangkoku przystojniaka, który wrzuca im do bagażu narkotyki. Celnicy znajdują u turystek zakazane substancje, za co zostają one skazane na 33 lata ciężkiego więzienia. I tu zaczyna się koszmar. Bo o ile Bridget Jones bawiła się za tajskimi kratkami przednio w czasie jednej ze swoich licznych przygód, w przypadku Amerykanek sprawa wygląda dramatycznie. Nie będę spoilerować, więc na tym skończę.
Kilka lat po wzmiankowanej projekcji przeczytałam „12 razy śmierć” Michała Pauli, który za przemyt ecstasy został skazany przez tajski sąd na karę śmierci. Ba, nawet byłam z nim na spotkaniu autorskim, gdy ostatecznie udało mu się po sześciu latach opuścić Bang Kwang. Polecam lekturę. Przerażająca do samych trzewi.
Dlatego gdy kupiliśmy bilet do Bangkoku wpadłam w popłoch. Przecież zawsze poznajemy mnóstwo osób, snujemy się po szemranych uliczkach. Jak nic wyląduję w najsurowszym więzieniu świata. Poprosiłam więc naszych licznych znajomych, którzy już ten kraj zwiedzili, o wskazanie jakich miejsc czy też sytuacji należy unikać, aby nie narażać się na niebezpieczeństwo. Wszyscy, jak jeden mąż, zareagowali totalnym osłupieniem twierdząc, że gdzie jak gdzie, ale w Tajlandii na pewno nic nam się stać nie może.
Nie będąc do końca przekonana co do wiarygodności tych zapewnień, z mini-duszą na ramieniu opuściłam lotnisko Suvarnabhumi i ruszyliśmy do taksówki. Nie ma najmniejszego problemu, żeby jakąś złapać – stoi ich tam multum, czekasz grzecznie w kolejce i po maks 10 minutach mkniesz już do swojego miejsca noclegowego. No chyba, że masz w torbie podręcznej muflona, bagnet, albo zamierzasz uprawiać seks tudzież zapasy (do tej pory nie wiem czego dotyczy trzeci rysunek). To wtedy nie wolno.
Jechaliśmy może ze 3 minuty, tymczasem taksometr pokazał jakieś 50 przebytych kilometrów. Sebastian zapytał kierowcy czy ma nas za skończonych idiotów, pan dyplomatycznie przemilczał, a następnie popukał w licznik, stwierdził, że nie działa i zaczął krzyczeć coś do kogoś przez komórkę. W mojej głowie dialog kształtował się mniej więcej tak:
„Cześć. Tu Po Fo. Jadę z dwójką białasów. Nie chcą się wkręcić z przestawionym licznikiem. Weź z pracy czapkę policjanta i kilogramową torbę kokainy. Widzimy się za 5 minut”.
Ostatecznie żaden przebierany funkcjonariusz nie przyjechał, a my zapłaciliśmy normalną stawkę, jaka wtedy była wskazywana na formach internetowych za właściwą, biorąc pod uwagę dojazd do centrum. (ciekawe czy chodziło o to, że mundur był akurat w praniu).
Hotel wybraliśmy bardzo dobry. I lokalizacyjnie – rzut beretem od Khao San i jednocześnie od Rattanakosin, czyli zjawiskowego Pałacu Królewskiego. I wizualnie- ascetyczna czystość, len, biel, drewno, siedząc w klimatyzowanym pokoju z zasłoniętymi oknami można przypuszczać, że jest sie w Skandynawii. I pod względem client service- obsługa z płynnym angielskim, kontynentalne śniadania (co było bardzo ważne, ale o jedzeniu w osobnym poście), wi-fi, dzięki któremu mogliśmy informować rodzinę, że żyjemy Nie tylko nam się to miejsce podobało, o czym świadczy częste pojawianie się Warehouse Bangkok na łamach prasy (http://www.thewarehousebangkok.com/press.php). Szczegółowa recenzja napisana przez Sebastiana do przeczytania pod tym linkiem.
Owszem, nocować można znacznie taniej, za naprawdę niską – zwłaszcza w porównaniu z polską agroturystyką ostatnich lat – cenę. My jednak wiedzieliśmy, że Bangkok potrafi pochłonąć – o czym dobitnie przekonaliśmy się na własnej skórze – że jest głośny, brudny, duszny i męczący, dlatego warto mieć miejsce, w którym po całym dniu uda się wypocząć.
Poruszanie się po tajskiej stolicy to bardzo schizofreniczne doznanie. Z jednej strony środków komunikacji jest gazylion. Taksówki, tuk tuki, metro, tramwaj, łódź etc. Przejechaliśmy się absolutnie wszystkimi, tuk tukiem naturalnie już pierwszego dnia, ponieważ stanowił jedną z atrakcji. Muszę przyznać, że naprawdę warto. Z drugiej strony nikt nie przestrzega przepisów. Absolutnie nie należy kierować się kolorem świateł, ponieważ może to być brzemienne w skutkach. I nie wgapiać w ekran smartphona podczas przechodzenia przez ulicę, no chyba, że myśli samobójcze nie dają spokoju. Na skrzyżowaniach jesteśmy Usainem Boltem- jak nie to mokrą plamą.
Chodziliśmy wszędzie, o każdej porze dnia i nocy, mimo iż niektóre miejsca nie zachęcały do ich odwiedzenia. Bywało bardzo biednie, brudno, i mimo że część ze spotkanych tam osób mieszka w blaszanych slumsach, nie wydawali się ani agresywni ani specjalnie nieszczęśliwi. Po prostu żyli. A my przez chwilę byliśmy częścią ich codzienności.
Muszę przyznać, że bardzo podobał mi się spokój jaki emanował z mieszkańców Tajlandii. W ogromnym, zatłoczonym, dusznym, śmierdzącym, lepkim i kolorowym Bangkoku oni sobie egzystują w stanie równowagi, której brakuje goniącym za niedookreślonym szczęściem ludziom z krajów wysokorozwiniętych. Ciężko mi sobie wyobrazić Taja np. na leżance u psychoterapeuty, zwłaszcza w sytuacji, gdy widziałam ich rozkładających stare szmaty na ulicy celem zażycia drzemki. Widziałam ubóstwo, ale nie widziałam rozpaczy. Ktoś tam sprzedaje kolorowe gwizdki, inny wyciska owoce, kolejny czyta gazetę obok włożonego do kartonu dobytku życia, dzieci bawią się na zewnątrz tym co znajdą pod ręką. I cały czas bije od nich harmonia. Być może jest to zupełnie niewłaściwe odczytanie sytuacji, zwłaszcza że nie byłabym w stanie zrozumieć o czym rozmawiają. Niemniej jednak mowa ciała wskazywała na stabilność, do której nam, ludziom Zachodu, daleko.
Bangkok to tygiel z wrzącą zupą doznaniową. To miliony świateł, dźwięków, zapachów i obrazów. To skrajności, gdzie przeszłość przenika się z teraźniejszością, a przepych z biedą.
Są miejsca od których oczu nie można oderwać, czyli kompleks pałacowy czy wszystkie niespotykane na starym kontynencie świątynie, które cudownie ogląda się w pełnej okazałości prosto z pokładu łódki. Promienie słoneczne intensyfikują złotość zdobień, które hipnotyzują i przyprawiają o niezły zawrót głowy.
No i jest Khao San. Gdyby ktoś Wam kiedykolwiek proponował nocleg w tej lokalizacji, przybijcie mu piątkę. Najlepiej krzesłem. W głowę. To mniej więcej tak, jakbyście chcieli nocować na koncercie Behemota. Albo w tartaku. Totalnie backpakerska ulica, na której jest absolutnie wszystko- popularne światowe fastfoody – a wieczorami uliczne stoiska z jedzeniem (ale o tym w oddzielnym poście), kantory, mnóstwo stoisk z ubraniami, w których niegodnym jest nietargowanie się, fish pedicure, tajskie masażystki. No i oczywiście knajpy. Wszelakie.
My ze swojej strony możemy zapewnić, iż nie należy zamawiać special drinków. Nie oznaczają one wcale koktajli z większą dawką alkoholu. Ale to z uwagi na dobro ogółu przemilczymy.
Aha – wychodząc wieczorem zostawcie w hotelowym sejfie paszporty i większość gotówki. I uważajcie na ladyboyów- są wyjątkowo silni.
A propo lady boyów – sądzę, że mogę się już habilitować w zakresie rozpoznawania, która z mijanych osób od urodzenia jest kobietą. Podpowiem, że istotna jest wielkość jabłka Adama. Oraz fakt, że mało która babka wygląda tak perfekcyjnie, jakby ją zdęli wprost z taśmy produkcyjnej.
Piękni shemale nie mają zresztą wielkiego problemu z tym, by o siebie zadbać. W Bangkoku można kupić w zasadzie wszystko. I to za grosze. Ubrania, zwierzęta, nerkę, dyplom magistra.
Jeśli czegoś nie masz- jedź do Tajlandii. I tu dobra rada- walizkę warto wypełnić tylko niezbędnymi rzeczami i na miejscu obkupić się w co tylko dusza zapragnie. Tym bardziej, że lokalsi oferują za niewielką kwotę usługę prania, suszenia i prasowania, więc jeśli ktoś nie ma obiekcji natury higienicznej, to może nawet ograniczyć się do bagażu podręcznego (walizkę oczywiście kupi na drogę powrotną).
Oczywiście celem zakupów można skorzystać z centrum handlowego (albo pójść tam tylko po to, by schłodzić się przy klimatyzacji), ale najfajniejsze są bazary. I to jeszcze odwiedzane wieczorem. Jak już dostawać oczopląsu to lepiej nie na pełnym słońcu.
Między polecanym przez nas hotelem a Rattanakosin rozkłada się po zmroku jedno z takich targowisk. Nam najbardziej podobał się czwórdzielny parawan, który skrywał w każdej części innego specjalistę. Był ortodonta, pani od warkoczyków, tatuator a w ostatniej części można było przekłuć sobie uszy.
Niekwestionowanym królem bazarów jest jednak Chatuchak, czyli największy weekendowy targ na świecie. Ten potwór ma nawet własną mapę, która nam się niestety nie przydała. Po wyjściu z entego stoiska miałam wrażenie, że nadal jestem w tym samym miejscu. Labirynt minotaura, z którego wydostać się można nie dzięki kłębkowi nici, lecz pustce w portfelu (owszem, są tam bankomaty, tylko weź i je znajdź). Poza tym, że można się ubrać na każdą porę roku, dnia, czy okazję, wyżywić, niezależnie od tego czy jest się mięsożerca czy frutarianinem, to jeszcze urządzić mieszkanie. Istne szaleństwo. Podają się mu setki ludzi, więc socjopatom oraz cierpiącym na agorafobię – nie polecam.
Zresztą nie tylko na Chatuchaku dostarczysz sobie rozkoszy podniebienia.
Wkrótce nowe posty, min. o tym dlaczego Tajlandia jest dobra dla chcących się odchudzić łakomczuchów oraz tym czy w Krabi kraby są najlepsze na świecie.
O jezu, ile razy nas próbowali orżnąć w Bangkoku. Pierwsza cena jaką usłyszałam za taksówkę z lotniska to było 1200 bathów + zapewnienie, że nigdzie nie znajdę taniej. Potem zeszliśmy do tej oficjalnej kolejki. Tam pan zaproponował nam 450 bathów i podjaraliśmy się jak dziki, bo w necie czytałam o 700. Czułam, że nikt mnie nie oszukał aż… znów wracaliśmy na lotnisko.
Za tą samą trasę, tylko w drugą stronę zapłaciliśmy 300 bathów 😀 Naiwność wpisana jest w podróż, zwłaszcza, jeśli się gdzieś jest pierwszy raz.
ufff, czyli usprawiedliwieni 🙂
I do agree with all of the ideas you have presented in your post. They are really convincing and will definitely work. Still, the posts are too short for newbies. Could you please extend them a little from next time? Thanks for the post.
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